Please be advised that this is a review of the 2D version of the film and does not include a review of the 3D effects.

Shark Night is a film about a group of college kids that are attacked by sharks while vacationing on a lake. I can honestly state that this movie delivers exactly what it promises. I did not expect this movie to be anything other than campy horror fun. What I witnessed, however, was poor attempt to be “edgy” with its jarring use of slang and over-abundance of stereotypes. This movie included every cliched archetype seen in cinema in the last 50 years, to include the “token” black guy, drunk hillbilly sheriff, over-tanned pretty boy, slutty tattooed girl, geeky best friend, and the cute smart guy, who has a crush to the damaged blonde, although she may still be in love with her rugged ex-boyfriend, whom she accidentally scarred. Even though I know this is a remake, I may have been misguided in thinking this story might have some originality*.

The downfall of the film is that I found myself cheering every time one of the characters was attacked for the sole reason that fewer cast members meant that the movie was almost over. The characters are introduced quickly and only one of them, Gordon, is actually likeable. The main factor for this may have been that he was played by Joel David Moore (Avatar and Bones) and is the only one of the main cast members that can actually act.

The shining light in this film is that the shark attacks are beautiful, although tamer than expected due to the PG-13 rating. There are several scenes of sharks flying through the air and being all-around terrifying, except the one scene where the main character is tied to a chair about to be eaten by a tiger shark. The close up of the shark showed its smiling face and I actually felt glad that the shark was going to enjoy its meal. It deserved it.

Surprisingly this movie does ask an important question: can a man, who has had his arm bitten off by a shark, arise from his power nap and kill the shark with a spear that just happened to be laying around? Thankfully, the movie gives us the answer when the shark has been speared and the character is punching it to death. (This was not as bad ass as it sounds, I promise.) I would like to think that this was a failed attempt of the director stating that we can overcome every adversary, no matter how little blood there actually is flowing into our brain. Every time I think about it, however, I only have more questions. Questions that may actually keep me up at night, like “Why did I actually pay money to see this movie?” 

-Dj Creepiz

*Note – I have not seen the original film and therefore am not able to compare the two.