Those kooky reports have been piling into my inbox that IGN had a top scoop on the nitty gritty over the new Nintendo Wii Video Channel. Looks like they were right. I've got all the news you need to know about the upcoming Wii Video Channel that hits Japan next month....

Right after the break.

Funny Comments and Notes Highlighted in Bold 

Not exactly following on the heels of digital content Nintendo is turning its sights on video downloads next month. May 1st is the set release date for the big N to show off its video download service to the public.

The channel is being called the Wii no Ma channel which ironically enough the channel is less just for video downloads but once again an ingenious social invention to bring your family unit closer together. It's a virtual living room (SUCK on THAT Sony Home) that you and seven other family members (see:friends that you trust to touch your stuff without completely destroying it) register your Miis to the channel by imputting age, birthdate, and blood type. This will cause the Miis to appear and interact in this living room where time will progress in real time.

So what I'm really saying is that you will probably sign up for this service once and by the next time you have friends over to play Mario Kart you will find 7 tiny Mii skeletons that have died from malnutrition just like that Tomagotchi your Mother and I got you for your 8th birthday because we knew you werent responsible enough NOT to kill it.

Now in this "living room" you will have access to a couple varieties in activies. Wanna watch video? Click on the TV and it will provide you with access to the video download service allowing you to search by key words. (i.e. - farts, crying children, and Bill Cosby....I did extensive YouTube research to find the top terms searched by our demographic)

Now Nintendo has stated that although they will not be sharing a list of programming the initial content will be light and grow to be larger like a video Katamari...ok they didnt say that thing about the Katamari I just put that in there to make it sound more Asian.

Now I wouldnt say Nintendo is into to viral marketing but they are into printing money with pokemon on it. Gotta catch'em all right? RIGHT? Well Nintendo is offering their marketing partners space in your "virtual" living room. If you click on the plastic plant you'll be taken to a parade (yes, a fucking parade) that will allow you the option to select one of said marketing partners and download videos of their products and request free samples be sent to your house. Why YES I would love some of that new eye bleach!

Apparently to round out all of this oddness Celbrity Miis will visit your living room occasionally. Nintendo prefers to use the term "Concierges" as these Miis will help show you special programming. I don't think we've had this many celebrity living room apperances since back in 98 when it was COOL for celebrities to get drunk and stumble through your home at random.

Your living room also includes a calendar, which will offer daily content.

Now as for the squid monster that tops off this crazy japanese sunday DSi owners will be able to move downloaded video content from their Wii to their DSi for quick viewing while on the move.

For more info on this interesting new channel head on over to www.wii.com and see the special site Nintendo has set up where you can view more of the features in an nice little intro video.

While right now Nintendo is focusing mainly on the Japanese market they have expressed interest in bringing the channel overseas to the US. I suppose only time will tell.